French lifestyle

Why I love the company of confident women

Why do I love the company of confident women? A good friend of mine once said to me that she loved being around confident women because it was so easy.  On the other hand, she found it hard work being around women with too many complexes and low self-esteem:  she was forced to walk on egg shells, build them up incessantly, deal with egos that needed non-stop coddling. I completely agree with her.

As I look around and see the community of women I choose to hang out with, I realize how true it is:  confident women are a joy and inspiration to be around.  Sure we all have our hang-ups and fair share of issues, but they don’t need to overtake our life to the point of draining the energy of those around us.  Energy draining women (and men for that matter) can be spotted miles away – just the mere thought of them sucks the life out of you.  Crowding out that kind of negative energy means that you can fill your life with all the great things you want in it!

Confident women are positive!
  1. If you are the sum of the 10 people you hang out with most, then I want to hang out with confident people only!  (What a concept, right?  Who are the people you most hang out with and do you want to be more like them?  If not, what are you doing?)
  2. Confident women don’t pick themselves apart incessantly…sure they know they have faults and they might have some complexes, but they don’t focus on only those!  They are positive and ready to move forward! And they take action to change what they don’t like about themselves.
  3. You don’t need to constantly reaffirm your friendship with a confident woman.  They know you have a life, they have one too – when both of you are ready to free up time and enjoy one another, it will come.  No hard feelings either way.  It’s about quality time, not quantity.
  4. A confident woman can speak to anyone about anything, and if they don’t know anything about what is being said, they will ask questions to fill their curiosity.  Also, the need to be heard is not always necessary:  a confident woman doesn’t have to be the center of attention! They don’t have to be right. They don’t have to be the best. But if they have something interesting and intelligent to say, they say it!
  5. Confident women are invariably positive and optimistic.  So who the heck doesn’t want to hang around someone like that!?
They follow their gut!
  1. Additionally, confident women are risk takers – even if they are not life-altering risks, risks nonetheless.  It takes guts to take risks on many levels – personal, professional, emotional, as a parent.  Hanging out with risk takers is inspiration in itself.
  2. Confident women stick to their intuition, their gut feeling, and go with it…even if it is against the grain of society.  In an age where opinions, trends, fashion, likes and dislikes are transported globally in less than a nano second, a confident woman knows that – even if she is swimming upstream – she is going to stick to what she believes…no matter how unpopular.
Don’t put other women down!
  1. This is a big one: confident women DO NOT feel the need to put other women down.  We are a sisterhood for sure. It might be 2022 now, but on a global level there are still many issues that women have to face (inequality in the workforce, unequal pay, health issues, parenting and working, humanitarian rights, and the list goes on and on and on….).  We need to stick together and not put each other down in a crazy competition-ridden mentality.
  2. Confident women celebrate other women and their achievements without an ounce of jealousy.  They know that what one woman achieves can only be of benefit to other women. And draw inspiration from it, not jealousy!
  3. Confident women do not compete with their girlfriends or women around them! Period. So much to say on this point. Confident women don’t boast incessantly or talk about their personal greatness ad nauseam.  If you have ever been in the company of women who are passive-aggressively putting women down on any level only to feel better about themselves, then you know you leave their company feeling uninspired and perhaps inadequate.  Big alarm bells should ring – no positive energy or confidence there!
Always thinking of others!
  1. Confident women are likely to raise confident daughters!  We need young girls to focus on their passions, their education, their contributions to society.  So, confident women are less likely to be overly concerned with their daughters wearing the right jeans and having the latest accessories. Rather, they are more interested in steering their daughters into a passionate future. A future where they can use their minds, foster their interests and inspire others through their actions!
  2. Confident women are a sheer joy to be around. They don’t focus only on themselves, but take interest in what others say and do.  She will ask others about themselves and revel in their stories, the lessons, the successes, the experience.
  3. Confident women don’t obsess over their appearance. Sure we all want to look our best and put in the effort to look and feel good. But the confident woman knows there is more to life than just lipstick, fashion or our Instagram feed. There is certainly more depth in relationships with confident women.
  4. A confident woman will tell you how she feels and ask for clarification when things go belly up. There is no time or energy spent on “wondering” or “he said, she said” mumbo jumbo.  You always know where you stand!  She will own up to mistakes and has no problem apologizing when appropriate!  

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